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The Guy and the Blind singer are talking at the bar: "You play golf!?" he asks and the blind Singer says, "Yes, I have been playing for years." "But I thought you were blind, how can you play golf if you are blind?" Jack asks. " I get my caddie to stand in the middle of the fairway and he calls...

Adduction is when you put a Duck in a Pond. Seduction is when you observe the duck in the pond. Reduction is when you remove the duck from the pond. Production is when the pond has baby ducks swimming.

Guy comes out of the restroom at a rest area. Said he was going to Texas away from his wife and kids. He had stopped at a rest area earlier in the day. When he came out, returning to his Soccer Van his side windows, all were broken. Now Thas love got to do wid it ! I saw it. Those Chrysler’s...

"I want you to skip your diet every other day.!" The next time I see you, you'll have lost at least 5 pounds." When the blonde returned, she shocked Her doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that's amazing," h er doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The blonde nodded... "I'll tell...

Me and my Mechanic get along very well, I keep taking cheap shots and he keeps charging less. My Lil Woman's similar, more I save the less crap she gives me. If I come home with the paycheck and say, "can you deposit it tomorrow?" She fixes dinner, and says, "we don't need to go out tonight." TWSS

Me and my Mechanic get along very well, I keep taking cheap shots and he keeps charging less. My Lil Woman's similar, more I save the less crap she gives me. If I come home with the paycheck and say, "can you deposit it tomorrow?" She fixes dinner, and says, "we don't need to go out tonight." TWSS

I don't tell that I broke a leather shoelace here. The bladder won out the day. Sure, the EMT offended me with what he asked and why did he ask it. Of course, I called it in immediately, well, as soon as I could. Yea sure I believed I can ride a Motorcycle forever, why not. It's cool, ya feel...

Two Identical Twin Brothers who haven't seen each other for years are at the Family reunion. One asks, "is Mindy still as lovely as when you first met." The other Brother says, "Yeah Mindy's great, but it takes her a couple hours longer."

The Powerboost seems to have huge problems with its leaking / cracked Transmission pan. also Now more Ford recalls today. U want to tow a big Camper buy a F350- dually with a diesel. Thats a no brainer. The Gallons of gas savings of 20,000 miles will work well.

Charlie's the old piece of lasso & he steps into a bar one day for a drink. Bartender looks at him suspiciously and says, "Hey, Pal, we don't serve ropes here." Charlie steps outside, ties himself into a clove hitch and unravels one of his ends into a unraveled mess. He goes back inside, orders...

The hunters decided to take a leak.... He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun. Just then a gust of wind blew, the gun fell over, and discharged... shooting him in the balls. Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was approached by the Doc on Call. "Well, I have some good news...

I think I been thru worser January 1sts. If you think it's been tougher, raise our hands. Then put your hands together and hold em tight.

A brake warning may need a Rusted up Caliper adjusting slide. If you have Electric locking emg. brakes they are great for rusting up. Then the adjusting slide just freezes and stuff wears out of line with the Rotor. These trucks are full of sensors and relay power controls. Just trying to...

The God's Head said to the Man, "do not worry, you will find Woman at all 4 corners of the Earth and Man was to believe and voyaged / Trekked all over the World in search of a Mate. So, yea he sort of thought the world was flat, who could blame him. ....(y) So, The God's Head Chuckled and made...

The God said to the Man, "do not worry, you will find Woman at all 4 corners of the Earth" (and Man) he chose believe Gods word (Actually he was born with the word Chase Pussy in his heart) and So the voyaged / Trekked all over the World in search of a Mate move onwardward. So, The God Head...

I wish I could go back to the Mid 70's and my Blazer. Wait I can if I can find one. Bigger thing was 13 MPG. The less complicated you buy a vehicle ie options most likely the less problems you are gonna have. Just an old gear binder is best if you can fix, are handy with your shop...

^Most people find inspiration in insurance. Dawg inspires anger, hatred and live in a couple gasps after a wet tongue!

^Dawg keeps waking him up to go outside. What does rest have to do with it?